The longer I live the more I begin to realize that I may be one of the biggest fools on this rock we call a planet. The more I realize that the world I wish for will never be more than a dream.

Perhaps that is why I find myself daydreaming and meditating more often in my moments of solitude. Then I can still feel the cool grass between my toes... the touch of a gentle wind on my face... the smell of the sea hinted at in the air...

Yet again, too, am I in conflict with my instincts. I have a wonderful woman, a partner that I never could have hoped for in my wildest dreams, a soul so bright it makes mine feel as black as the darkness from whence I came. Why then, do I question her? Why do I doubt her sincerety in wanting the same things I myself desire? Because I love her so. I want to know that she enjoys things as much as I--and not because she is with me, but because she desires doing such things as much as I do. Perhaps I am simply all the more a fool for even doubting her as such.

Todd once said, and I quote him often, that "humans aren't worth the flesh they're printed on." I have to agree that the vast majority of them are not. I don't consider myself very human, so I feel as a third party to the quote. But I think about it and I wonder... what am I worth?